Should We Pretend?

Sunday, September 02, 2012 JS Hanniffy 0 Comments


Some weeks ago, I deleted some people on my facebook. Absolutely not thinking because they were dislike people, it because based on reasons that I and them had no regulary contact with each other anymore. 

So based on this dodge, I then was thinking: "No reasons to keep these people on the friendlist". I then started to unfriend them one by one from my facebook.


After one day of removal, one of them, whom, I've known from more than years, and was also being deleted, wrote on his status about his removal from my friendlist which I infer that wasn't crucial at all to be talking-point, but that's all what facebook about, to posting anything  important or unimportant.

In spite of we secretely don't like each other, keeping the familiarity is more norm than markedly hostile for us, and I hate for this: to be 'pretending' with dislike people.

Yesterday, I met him in the town together with his family. We had a small conversation for less than an hour. And then I went off to a shop, looking for a gift for their baby. They seemed very happy with the gift, and so do I. 

As I said earlier, I hate to be pretending, but in the same I don't want to be cruel as well as person. This dissonance attitude might also apply to him (maybe not as much as I hate this situation).

When I consider to this situastion it suddenly leads me to Lapiere study about why people behave differently from attitude. Still no certainty proves about this study, but some psychologists, whom, study behaviour and attitude, there few fortiori have been considered why this can happen.

Normality as unexceptionable to be put on the top list of their consideration. We are often taught by  our surroundings, specially our parents, teaching us how to behave better. Such as school also constitute lead for the shape of our norm. Yet, dogma should not be forgotten as the most affecting doctrine on people's behaviour and attitude.

According to that it means we don't actually pretend to like each other, our norm prevent us from 'hostility'.  But there is no socialnetwork norm about removing friend from your fb, so why should he bother then?

Till tomorrow,
s'pore 10.52-020912


Blogger since 2008, writing with a fresh perspective.

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